Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Small miracles

Ok, so I guess I can't complain about EVERYTHING.  I just have to hit myself on the head and remind myself to count the blessings that I DO have and quit crying about the ones I don't.  At least one big weight fell off of my shoulder today.  And there's only one more week left before my husband leaves.  That'll be the biggest chunk ever.  I only wish things weren't this way.  I had never imagined myself being alone.  But soon, I will be.  He's finally told me he'll sign divorce papers if I sent them to him.  Before, he would always say there's no way he'd divorce me.  That I was his until we die.  I know I'm going to cry like a baby when they tell me I'm single.  I had always dreamed of a future with him, watching our kids grow up.  I dreampt of the times he would walk our daughters down the aisle and give them away.  And stand beside our sons when they watched their brides walk towards them.  I even dreampt once of us sitting on the porch, both of us in rocking chairs, watching the grand-kids play in the front yard.  For anybody who likes The Judds, one of their songs hits really close to my sentiments..."Grandpa, tell me 'bout the good ol' days."  Especially the lines that say "Where lovers really fall in love to stay, stand beside each other come what may" and "Daddies really never go away."  Talk about nostalgia.  I can only think of one friend of mine that has been with her husband since high school.  The rest have been divorced or separated from theirs (including husband-boyfriends as I call them).  Why can't we go back to days where people wouldn't even mumble the word "divorce" for fear of being struck down by God?  People were more solid in their choices back then, and in their commitment and responsibilities.  Men made babies to take care of them.  Maybe we could even learn a lesson or two from our canine brothers, the wolves.  They mate for life.  They only take another "partner" if one dies, and sometimes not even then.  Are we so stupid that dogs are smarter than us?  Sheesh.

Sunday, May 23, 2010

When Will This Nightmare END?????????

I finally see my sanity at the end of this long, dark tunnel.  Why does it happen, that when you're really waiting for something to happen, that that's when life goes into slow-mo?  So much needless pain and suffering will finally end, but the end of that is slow in coming.  Why does life do that to us?

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Eh, what else is there to do?

I was actually being a good girl and getting things done early, only to find out that technical support has to work on issues regarding the KU platform, which means.....I can't get into the classrooms to do my work!  Of course!!!!!!!  When I actually try to keep up instead of procrastinating in the last few hours, I CAN'T GET INTO THE CLASS!  So this majorly blows.  Hopefully this little "issue" will be fixed by the time class starts tonight.  Come on tech support, SUPPORT!

Thursday, April 29, 2010

Steaming

Yes, you read right.....steaming.  I have to vent some way, so I figure my blog is a good place for that.  Men are such idiots sometimes, no wonder so many women go crazy!  I just spent an hour in seminar with a crying, screaming baby, missing half of what was said, all because his father decides to pick that moment to go visit his friend instead of watching the babies for me while I took class.  As if one hour was going to kill him.  If he didn't want the responsibilities of watching children, why the hell did he get married????  I'm still asking myself that after 8 years.

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

The start of 4th term

Well, here I am!  I had my first two classes tonight, and holy crap, what have I gotten myself into?!!!!!!!!!  I took on an extra class because I found myself a little bored in between seminar classes each week last term.  I figured that I might as well keep myself busy, and getting one step closer to my goal one step sooner wouldn't hurt either.  But man, the classes I had today are going to be busy!  And then tomorrow I have Anatomy & Physiology II.  If it's anything like part I, I'm in trouble.  I hope it's not going to be too hard, but more of an extension of what I just finished with the first part of the class.  But I guess I'll see!  The good thing is, I noticed that it's a professor that I had before for my Medical Law and Ethics class my very first term.  Hopefully she'll remember me?!  I think all in all though, I'm going to enjoy this term.  Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Just thinking...

Now that this term is over, and I've received my books for the next, and am actually looking forward to starting it, watch this next week be the longest week of my life!  Why does time fly by so quickly when you're looking forward to something or actually enjoying something, and then it drags and drags when you wish something would happen already?!  Time is so funny....it's ridiculous!  I keep looking at my books for next week's beginning classes and just find myself sighing, wishing I was in seminar already.  Maybe I'm just weird?  Who looks forward to school??  I think there's something in the water.  I should go get that checked...just in case.  Yeah, just in case.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

End of term

I DID IT, I DID IT, I DID IT!!!!!!!  I ended this term with exactly what I was hoping for.....two A's!  I was soooo relieved!  I am just so glad it is over and done with because this term really kicked my butt!  But I stuck to my guns and stayed for the long haul, and came out on top!  Yay!  I think I deserve a night out or something.  Maybe buy myself something nice....who knows?  But I did it!